Why Discipline Often Fails

Parenting is hard. There is no manual, there is no perfect parent and most of the advice you receive conflicts with other advice given. Each and every child is different and therefor any manual or advice may not work for you or your child. And here we are writing a blog with more advice 🙂 Maybe, instead of direct advice, it would be more helpful to try some general principles.

I would like to review The Parenting Pyramid from The Arbinger Company. Often correction or discipline is seen as a thing you do when your kid is out of line. Look at the pyramid below and try thinking of it another way. There is a whole lot more under misbehavior than you may realize. If a child is acting out and correction is not helping, you may need to revisit how well you have taught them. If the teaching is not working well, you likely need to work on your relationship with the child more. If you can’t seem to connect well with your child, you might need to start with getting on the same page with your partner/child’s other parent. Lastly, if things are not clicking with your spouse, then you just may need to look more honestly at yourself and your part in things.

This can all be hard to hear, but may also be just what the doctor ordered and will get to the root of why your discipline efforts are not working. I have attached the link to this model. Check it out and see if things don’t improve at home. Good luck.

By Darren J. Gillespie, LCSW

 

 

Click to access parenting_pyramid.pdf